So this is where I am…

I wanted to take some time and write to tell anyone who still reads this blog part of where I am in my life. Most people who know me well, and who are close to me if they were talking to you right now about me would undoubtedly report similar insights. They would probably say I have changed in some regards. They might say that I have become less calm, flowers, and tree hugging; and more abrasive. They might tell you that I have become more focused on war and politics. They would be telling the truth to a degree. You see I am angry and sad a lot of the time. Who isn’t with the things going on in this country and in the world at large? If you can find someone who isn’t then I have to say that person has somewhat checked out of reality. Towards the end of 2014 or the beginning of 2015 I saw something that changed me. 

What I saw I can never un-see. 

It will be with me all the days of my life. It altered my worldview to a degree. I can’t sincerely describe myself as a peace maker the way I used to be able to. I saw a video of around twenty men lined up on a beach and beheaded in gruesome detail. I saw my fellow Christians become martyrs not by choice but by brutal and evil force. It was a video message from ISIS one of the many Islamic terrorist groups that are among us. I have watched as the American president who is so obviously anti-American has driven our nation into ruin and set us up as weak sheep which he is leading to the slaughter. I know there are muslims out there who are decent human beings. However islam as an ideology is not something that is good. It is about loathing, fear, and wicked violence. Anyone who believes all the teachings of the koran or that sharia law should be part of any American legal system, something that can be forced on people who don’t believe in it…are terrorists. There really is no way to mince words about that, or to get around those facts. They are facts. That is the truth. I have watched the current administration drive out Christianity from our nation and replace it with islamization, brainwashing, and communism on an unprecedented scale. Even my pagan, new age, Taoist, and Buddhist friends have been marginalized. There was a time which many people are trying to deny now where a handful of wicked people began a movement that turned into one of the worst attempted genocides in human history. It is what we call the holocaust. Now however we are seeing something even worse than that. We are seeing a new ideology grip this nation that seeks to undo all that this nation is and was meant to be, and replace it with a cancer that will eventually spread throughout the rest of the world and allow evil to utterly take hold and root itself deeply. I can not just ignore what I know or pretend it isn’t happening. I can not sit around and listen to people who want to undermine the constitution and try and take away my rights…our rights! Especially our second amendment rights which are the very rights that empower us as human beings and citizens to keep our government and fellow human beings in check! A smart man once said, “A people should not be afraid of their government, the government should be afraid of its people”. These are wise words.

I am white in a time when it is alright to be racist as long as the races you despise are the white races. I am male in a time where feminazis have forced on us a legal system that says I as a male have few if any rights at all. I am a Christian and a minister at a time when it is alright to attack Christianity, Judaism, and true religion at every turn. We are in a time when other ideologies like islam, atheism, the two party system, the wickedness that is political correctness, communism, dictatorship, and all forms of tyranny abound and no one dares to say anything negative about them or to stand up and oppose them. People… islam is a great and terrible evil that must be defeated at all costs. It is time for a new set of crusades!!! I am a mystic who exists in a time when science tries to destroy any notion of the truth, spirituality, or the wonderful mystery of life and replace it with cold factoids that hold little relevance or meaning. Evidence is not proof, and even if it was…proof doesn’t necessarily equate to The Truth. I am a healer and live in a time when western medicine seeks to control every aspect of our lives and health, while making us sick, and murdering us daily through many various ways. I am a queer in a time where the battle for tolerance and acceptance is met with ever increasing war, violence, wickedness, hostility, fear, ignorance, and loathing. This is a time where our freedom of speech and our right to disagree has been legally stripped from us and replaced with sickening political correctness. I am a free thinker in a time when our education system (both public schools and universities alike) despises true education and learning and have replaced it with bullshit, lies, propaganda, and brainwashing. I am an artist in a time when either contemporary greedy athleticism or the horrid parts of pop culture (like the “reality” tv show real housewives) have replaced the arts and true entertainment with mindless idiocy, irrelevant drama, and rampant narcissism. I am a southerner in a time when just being from the south paints one as stupid and an extremist in the minds of others. I am a person who is trying to be a good patriot at a time when patriotism can get you arrested and when our rights, even our necessary right to bear arms is being forcibly taken from us by a government that was supposed to protect our rights and freedoms and instead has chosen to become wicked and tyrannical instead. A government more interested in the party politics of a two party system that is a disease upon this nation, and cares nothing for what is good or right or just. A government that spends its time trying to blind us to the truth with weapons of mass distraction and conspiracies rather than becoming what it was truly meant to become. A beacon of light in a dark world.

If I ever was truly a child, I am that no more. I am a man. Sometimes I am a lost man, or a sad man, or an angry man. Sometimes I am one or all of these things at once. I can tell you though that I am a man who is inspired. I have been convinced. I believe it is time to take a stand and fight back, with violence if necessary…though I hope it isn’t. I am a man who has convictions, a man who is trying desperately to get his life together and care for those he loves. I am a man who is trying to set out to truly live; to start up my own businesses, and to practice my vocations and earn a living for my efforts. I am a man who is frustrated, joyful, fierce, loyal, and who is trying to be as authentic as possible and live in integrity. I am a man who is full of both love and righteous indignation. I am a man who is hopeful and wants to help people and the world. I am a man who is at peace and yet still longs for more. I am a man who is seeking always to deepen his connection to God. I am a man who is fully human and fully a spirit. I am a man who is broken and wounded and ever healing and ever becoming whole. Many of us are all these things. So before you go and start harshly and negatively judging the changes the people you know might be going through; please stop and think, and question, and try and learn why they are changing? What in their lives changed that is changing them? I have changed to a degree it is true. I am a better man, a better person, and a better friend than I have ever been. I can see more clearly now. The world longs for truth, light, and love even if it doesn’t know it. Even if it often despises it and rejects it. The world wants goodness but it often doesn’t know how to accept it and live into it. People are often afraid of what they do not understand.

It doesn’t have to be that way however. There are changes going on in the world. Some are bad, but some are good as well. We can’t stop all things from changing but it is our human duty, privilege, blessing, and joy to be involved in the process and gift that is life. We don’t have to be afraid or live in fear. We just have to open ourselves to the understanding and awareness that there is more. We just have to learn that the possibility of more is what drives many of us. We just have to decide, and then stand! We just have to raise our voices and make our choices and do what is necessary. We might just have to fight at some point. At some point we have to stop being afraid and start living life. So yes I have gone through some changes, and I am glad of it. I am still working on all of my books and trying to get an online publishing company up and going. I am also still teaching the healing arts whenever I get the opportunity. I am still a caretaker for some elderly relatives and that is a constant challenge. I am still a proud American Neo-Celt! I am still Celí De (a certain type of Celtic Christian mystic). I am still a lover of the arts and literature. I have seen some beautiful and amazing things recently and read and listened to many terrific books. So that is where I am right now in life. I am doing research so that when my elderly relatives pass I can decide where I want to go and live our the rest of my days here on this earth. I want to head north, that I know. I want to go to a land of autumn and winter. I am really attracted to the northeast and even parts of Canada. I might even desire to move to someplace in Europe. I am looking forward to advancing my personal education in all the things I always wanted to learn and study. I want to start learning foreign languages. I want to find the ever elusive dream. I am not afraid though people try to convince me I should be. On the contrary, I am excited at what is to come.

“Every man dies but not every man really lives”. (Taken from the film Brave-heart)

Whatever happens…to paraphrase the great words of others with a twist; To Live would be an awfully great adventure!!!